Do you ever get that feeling once someone or something like a great Dog or a loved one in general dies that their "Spirit" stays with you and "watches us" grow and involve through life.
I'm beginning to start to wonder. i mean when i was a kid i was always being told that someone is watching over you and helping you and guiding you though life but I'm really starting to understand that more. Since moving onto my next chapter in life i have brought along with me all my childhood things such as your girlie toys and books.My name is Jane and I'm a Hoarder, i cant let go of all my things my family therapist said its because i was holding onto my favourite moments and times in my life but i don't really follow her much ..
Every so often i can feel my father around me not in a creepy ghost OMG kinda way but in a way like this was his plan for me, i now know why he choose certain books for me when i was little and how i magically worked at the pines resort for a summer. Ive been getting pieces of the HUGE unexplainable puzzle but I'm starting to understand how god had a plan all along.
My father gave me a book when i was younger about this local female writer that became hugely successful and famous and how he knew some day i would understand and love writing he knew that the young age of 5 that i was going to take my creative mind and love writing my thoughts down and sharing them with the world, he wanted me to share my love with the world.
He also saved a newspaper clipping of my Uncle Ray golfing at the Pines Resort golf classic, saved it so i would find this in all my boxes and know that he helped my fate in life get there, he knew i would be involved with this some day. He trained me how to understand golf so that someday once i am at the resort i could be involved with tournament that help others like the children's wish golf tournament i helped organize.
I remember when my father took me to see Madeline in the theaters and bought me a Madeline doll with the stitches and everything helping me understand why she needed her appendix out and why she would be okay. When John first called me from the hospital the night he had his appendix removed all i could think about is that moment in time when my father said these things happen all the time and everyone is always okay afterwards. Though moments in life spent with my father he knew that some day I would need him and that knowing his words of advice would help me in the future.
Its funny they say that men marry their mothers but i think i have found my father in my boyfriend. I believe my father had a plan for john as well . After my father passed from a snow mobile accident i hated snow mobiles with a passion they made me sick to look at and i don't even like talking about them still but John helped me with this he opened my heart back up to a winter sport that really had nothing to do with that accident my father was in. Dad knew that john could heal my heart and open my eyes to the world again.
I know this is completely long and probably UN followable but i can just blame it on the late hours of the night and the thoughts that just needed to be lifted off my mind.
Until next time ,
-Jane xo
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